There is a whole checklist of things your child should be able to do before going to kindergarten. Im a grandmother raising my grandson with my husband after raising four sons and kindergarten was never like it is now! Backing up the "not quite ready" date could . Children who are behind in these areas late into kindergarten may: In deciding whether your child should repeat kindergarten, it is important to consider whether he has all the skills he needs to go on to first grade. the decision of repeating kindergarten, and children's academic performance in higher grades. . You can point out how their words or actions made you feel and ask them to be more sensitive in the future . We missed the registration for pre-k by a week. "Repeating Kindergarten." Spelling tests in kindergarten? I cannot emphasize enough for little the child will care. My husband and I knew she wasnt doing well with reading so we recently enrolled her into the Sylvan Learning center. And the question of benefit vs. detriment can be a more difficult one to answer. That can be frustrating and cause kids to act out. In our CA school kids are expected to be reading at a D level by the end of Kindergarten. Is he flexible? In spite of how often this happens, it can come to a shock when the kindergarten teacher asks to speak with you suggesting your child repeat kindergarten. How Ethical Is It To Move to A Neighborhood for Its School Rating? Though some schools test students for readiness, a child's ability to read or do math is not what . . Constantly. I believe in trusting maternal instincts! Q Even though he had an early August birthday, we started our son in kindergarten at a private Christian school. Can he grip a pencil and cut paper with a scissors? Ask about any additional services the school can provide and what you can do at home to help. 6. My daughter is behind and her teacher wants to retain her. Read my reply above. Is your child curious and always wanting to learn new things? He cannot follow directions consistently enough and other kids are not being nice to him because he is more immature. His teacher is very, very strongly recommending we hold him back. Understood is a tax-exempt 501(c)(3) charitable organization (tax identification number 83-2365235). He gets out of school in 3 weeks and we are just hearing about this issue. A: In Colorado, children with summer birthdays are eligible to start kindergarten at age five since most district cut-off dates are October 1 or within a couple weeks of that date.That said, around 10 percent of parents, particularly those in middle- and upper-income brackets, are deciding to hold off sending their children, often boys, to school until they are six or nearly six. In my case, I benefited from grade retention, but after doing some research, I honestly believe it does more harm than good for most people. My son has completely lost his memory of everything he studied or learned. Repeating a grade increases the risk. - My son will be the last to learn how to drive. If it makes you feel better, I am POSITIVE you are doing the right thing. Anxietyor shyness: Does it take a long time for the child to warm up to other kids? He lives with adults and communicates like a little adult. After multiple evaluations and what not the school has basically been recommending to promote. Has a teacher recommended that your child repeat kindergarten? When my son Sammy started kindergarten, I looked forward to our first parent-teacher conference, imagining all the wonderful things the teacher would say about his interest in history and his precocious verbal skills. Check on the child's life situation. They might burst into tears when something goes wrong or get clingy when they feel insecure like little kids typically do. There are certain basic skills that all children should have going into first grade, no matter where they live. This is by far the hardest decision Ive ever made. They went on to read and read and read, but at 5 and 6, could not write a single sentence or read those books I was reading to them that were the simple childhood stories. This can make them cranky during the day. She has fine motor and minor speech issues and is receiving OT help. You have some options. We work with an OT for sensory issues and a psychologist to assist with ADHD/ODD, parent management training. Suddenly, scores on those tests were the only thing that mattered. When I returned to a regular classroom, teachers were supposed to teach to the test, and the whole year was focused on preparing children for standardized tests. Does he like to look at books? Then, for a few years, I taught in a school for behaviorally disordered children. The final decision about retention at the kindergarten level is usually up to the parents, but check the policy of your school district. Your child only turned 5 in August. Kindergarten starts around age 5 for a reason. I sort of understand. School will respect our decision at the end of the day, but I honestly did not realize we would feel this much lack of support. He has been diagnosed with ASD, is developmentally delayed and has ADHD. I am being sent home a retention letter Tuesday. If you decide to have your child repeat the year, it's better to switch teachers or even schools. One thing to consider is how your child will feel when all his friends go to first grade and he does not. Reassure him that you think he'll have a happy and successful year, and work with the teacher to help make that happen. Instead, I found myself teetering on a tiny chair while the teacher warned me that Sammy might have to repeat the year. we are so lost. Ideally, such programs allow children to develop at their own paces. You've asked a tough question. No ! He is very smart in my opinion, when he was 3 he could recite the pledge of allegiance and pledge to the Bible and much more. Your child is young for the grade, however, and repeating might give him more even footing with the other children in kindergarten. Andrew mined two large data sets in a way no researcher has done before and concludes that kids who repeat a year between kindergarten and fifth grade are 60 percent less likely to graduate high school than kids with similar backgrounds, and even . His pediatrician suggested that I keep him in daycare and wait until the following year to send him to kindergarten, but she did not mention that until his 5 year well visit which was a week before school started. Your use of the site indicates your agreement to be bound by our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. I served in the Army from 2006 to 2011 and deployed to Iraq twice, and then I graduated from Texas A&M University in May 2017. Moms know their children better than anyone. He has an attention issue. I was Also told as a child that i had Children with personal problems can't focus on school. She is such an amazing little person. So now what should you do? Here are more reasons kids may seem younger than other kids their age: Hyperactivity: Does the child seem to be driven by a motor, like the Energizer Bunny? I found out that a bunch of kids in my grade were like 21 months younger than me. But then again I just cant understand why 1st grade cant help him write his letters perfectly? https://today.tamu.edu/2018/03/27/14-year-study-holding-students-back-in-grade-school-hurts-their-chances-of-graduating/. The teacher has let him build legos, blocks pretty much all year. Some kids act younger than their peers because they are younger than most kids in the grade. (June 5, 2012). . It's about whether he or she is ready to make the jump to first grade. So because he is not doing well with blending sounds and he only knew 55 words of 100 on a site word test. Not a teacher, but have researched standards. I would love to get your opinion concerning my 5 year old grandson. Think about your child's emotional readiness. I just wanted to know what are my rights as a parent in the state of Texas. These policies typically focus on a student's chronological age when entering kindergarten. Ask your doctor to recommend someone or ask your school guidance counselor or psychologist for a consultation. Colors perfect gets along with other kids good, writes his name and letters and much more. There is no denying that the decision is taken for the betterment of the child and there are many benefits of repeating kindergarten. Repeating a grade at this age can indeed be beneficial. My 6 year old daughter is in Kindergarten at a private school in NYC. So I can see this both ways. This study was from Taiwan where the cut-off date, similar to the U.S., is August 31. Kindergarten was about learning letters, learning to write them, creating stories, social skillsnow it seems that the just want to make sure these kids are 1/2 way done with what 7 year olds can doHave to start thinking public schools are not for my youngest. Babies are born with immature immune systems. I wish he were only going 1/2 a day but that wasnt an option where we live. Im so conflicted. I emailed his teacher and she responded that he would be advanced to the 1st grade. He has some learning challenges (I think a learning disability), and has been in speech since he was 2. . But generally, if the school wants your child to go ahead, thats what will happen. Get that out of your head immediately. Is this a public or private school? I cannot give much advice about teaching on Kindergarten or early elementary level as I was a teacher for grades 8 and above in English and History. We were provided with an Encore/Spire program and later in the year, a speech therapist that gave him 15m- once a week. Time to catch up developmentally. Connect with other adults to find out what theyve noticed, and work together to help kids develop skills. It was mostly a year for "play-based learning," and the idea of a child being "held back" to repeat the grade might have seemed a little silly. Before using this Expert Advice area, please review our General and Medical Disclaimers. Information on our advertising guidelines can be found. Kristin J. Carothers, PhD is a clinical child psychologist devoted to the destigmatization of mental health problems. FamilyEducation does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. He may even be ahead of his new classmates. Here is what a teacher does in most classrooms. She doesn't know her letters, their sounds, or her numbers. She said he is average but not ahead of the others. Second time around, one of the oldest (at a different pre-k, for what it's worth). Free single copies of "The Elementary School Performance and Adjustment of Children Who Enter Kindergarten Late or Repeat Kindergarten," are available from the National Library of Education at . Weve read to him every day for long periods of time since he was 2 months old. Backing up . Kindergarten is not a fluff arts and crafts grade. What could be bad about spending more time on these skills before going to first grade? There is absolutely no way your best friend with a 6 month old girl has been told her 6 month old is ready for the first grade most babies dont even start walking until 9 months let alone every other thing a child needs to be able to do in 1st grade! I've done a lot of research and it's the general consensus that grade . That said, its important to note that learning disabilities may not even be diagnosed until the child goes to grade school. My 5 year old has math, reading, and spelling homework now. 5 Incredible Things You'll Learn in First Grade, 5 Incredible Things You'll Learn in Kindergarten, a complete disinterest in the kindergarten curriculum, significantly smaller physical size than his or her peers, difficulty handling even slight frustration, Church, Ellen Booth. So I told her teacher today that we will work hard with her and that if she isnt eligible to pass that I will be pulling her out of the school system because something isnt right when 3/5 of my children are at risk of failing right now. And if the issue is counting and numbers, or poor early reading skills, perhaps giving a child more time to learn numbers and letters; to hear stories read; and play with making rhymes, is indicated. Thanks in advance for any help you can offer! I was continuously told what an eager happy angel we had, however he never progressed to the standard. I believe with a one on one tutor for the summer it will help him perform better in the first grade. He or she probably could have used a bit more time before going to kindergarten, but you took a chance. Time to catch up academically. received feedback from a child's provider or pre-school teacher that your child may be too socially and academically immature to begin kindergarten, carefully consider that advice as well. Because children develop at such different rates and the kindergarten age span can run from 4 to 6, there is a tremendous range in social, physical and cognitive development. As a teacher, I have seen many students struggle as they are younger and immature compared to their cohort. They did some testing prior to the start of the Educators often say that during the first three years of school, a child is learning to read. Old born in November. For more than 20 years, Eileen Marzola has worked with children and adults with learning disabilities and attention deficit disorders, and with their parents and teachers. In our case, we're considering whether to have our son repeat first grade. As for seeing his friends going on ahead, I sympathize. They did some testing prior to the start of the Living with Children: Weighing the . While this justification has some merit, retention could actually be detrimental. Get in touch! Once I got to middle school I started to notice that all the other kids looked really little. Should you hold your child back from first grade and let her repeat kindergarten? Rather than be upset, it pays to remember that the only thing to think about here is the well-being of your child. During first year, was one of the youngest in the class. She will be older when she starts college. After that, we both went to a public high school and graduated at 19 years old in June 2006. Was a stronger speaker, reader, simple math, etc. Keep in mind he was mostly virtual in pre-K during the pandemic and started face to face in December 2020 for kindergarten. 4. Although these initial benefits faded over time, students who had been held back entered high school performing at a higher level relative to their grade level than similar students who'd been promoted. Joined Jan 19, 2002. I am afraid we will have a huge bubble of high school drop outs when those children reach the age of sixteen. Ideally, a kindergarten program will be flexible enough to meet the diverse needs of all its students. Can he work with others as a group? "Should Your Child Repeat Kindergarten?" He is doing wonderful in all other subjects 100s and smiley faces on his work. We feel like there is no support whatsoever from them in trying to retain. My best friend has a child who is 6 months old, a girl, and said to be 100% ready for 1st grade by her teacher. Thread starter katie111; Start date May 30, 2013; K. katie111 DIS Veteran. Instead, we got him the occupational therapy that was recommended, and he went on to have a great year in first grade. My sons school sends graded test and work hes done through out the year and hes been doing great! Another factor to consider is whether your child is as emotionally developed as his or her peers. While lots of schools still have a primarily play-based curriculum and relaxed standards, more and more have implemented a more academic approach to kindergarten, not only to get young children better prepared for first grade, when reading and math really take off, but also in an effort to meet increasingly objective and consequential government standards. He ended up repeating Kindergarten and is doing great, having just finished 7th grade. I might as well homeschool. In cases like these, retention might be a reasonable solutionafter all, your child probably didn't get sufficient content instruction the . However, Im still struggling with the decison. As far as hes concerned he didnt finish kindergarten and he believes this is a short break due to Covid. Thank you! Q: Even though he had an early August birthday, we started our son in kindergarten at a private Christian school. But when a child often acts immaturely compared to other kids the same age, you may wonder whats going on. You feel confused. He was immature socially and emotionally but was sight reading at 4. ??? First, identify the reasons. The decision to hold a child backoften called " red-shirting . To repeat kindergarten and that i was not smart enough to continue and my Parents disagreed, now i am 28 years old working with my respiratory therapist license saving lives. Our class has also been given 80 sight words and take spelling tests. To reading. They do testing of 4 parts. This is a misconception, and one that can be detrimental to the decision-making process. Scholastic.com. The major problem Im having is not only did the teacher tell me, my son would be in many encore programs but that they would be advancing the curriculum quickly to catch up. I taught gifted children in my career as a teacher who were held back in kindergarten by demanding and close minded teachers and parents. Communicate. But at this point, Id be grateful that she did spot a problem and tell you about it before he went on to first grade. My son turned 5 a week before the deadline. Anyone that can offer advise Id appreciate it. Kids develop skills at different rates. Is he good at sharing? Fast forward to high school and they STILL seemed little. When faced with the decision, the first step is to meet with your child's teacher (and principal and school psychologist, if possible) to find out exactly why the experts think another year would be productive. He has emotional issues, is not matured, does well with younger kids as is, and just has not yet developed emotionally where he should be for his age. Grade retention has a negative impact on all areas of a child's achievement (reading, math, and language) and socio-emotional adjustment (peer relationships, self-esteem, problem behaviors and attendance). My mom refused to have me held back, as there was nothing wrong with my intellect; in fact, I surpassed my peers in reading skills, as I began reading simple words at age 2 1/2- 3 years old and read story books aloud to my Kindergarten class. Should I trust the professionals or my instincts. It was almost like getting held back twice. Whether it's kindergarten for a second time or playing catch-up over the summer to prepare for first grade, a positive, low-pressure attitude is essential. Since standardized testing, and the mandates it presents to schools, pencil and paper learning have been pushed down into kindergarten, and even prekindergarten, and children are not all developmentally ready for that kind of learning at five years old. It does look as though you can argue against a decision to hold your child back. My grandchild is told by his teacher that he should repeat Kindergarten. Copyright 2014-2023 Understood For All Inc. developmental milestones at different ages, Annoying other kids by talking too much or barging in on their games, Overreacting to what seem like minor things and taking a long time to calm down, Clinging and not wanting to be apart from you, Having to be told the same rule over and over again, like Its not OK to climb on that furniture, Struggling with bathroom issues, like bedwettingor being afraid to poop, Being overly sensitive to things like loud noises or the way clothes feel, Using baby talk or speaking in ways that are hard to understand, Having trouble with things like putting on a coat or gripping a pencil. This document details the education code in Texas and your rights as a parent: EDUCATION CODE The data also suggests that in spite of having all these resources and manpower, kids who repeat kindergarten dont do as well as their first or second grade classmates once they make it into those grades. We did not have the money to send him to daycare and it was just to short of a notice. They did some testing prior to the start If you think she will be ready in every way: not just in reading, but emotionally and socially, go for it! Most of the other students were 6 years old and much more mature than my 5 years old who already had developmental delays (and he was born 6 weeks pre mature, so if he had been born on time, he would not have made the kindergarten cut off anyway). Rief also recommends requesting a student-support-team meeting. Sammy, for instance, could discuss ancient Troy but couldn't draw a stick figure. We were also told that having him repeat kindergarten would be devastating for him. You may be right that the primary problem is an inexperienced teacher. Me and his dad are leaning towards repeating. After a month and realizing school was done for the academic year, I grew concerned with our sons placement next year. Rather, a younger child's lack of maturity may make ADHD symptoms more obvious. His teacher has to repeat everything to him. Thanks. Would retaining him be beneficial? Some young children attain the age of reason, the ability . I cant tell you all shes put up with this year, all the extra tutoring in and outside of school, the testing, speech therapy, etc etc. He is constantly talking about being in the first grade next. Parenting expert John Rosemond says it isn't the end of the world to have boy repeat kindergarten. My frustration is with the teacher and her seeming intent in holding my little guy back for whatever reason by not supplying the tools necessary to help him be successful in kindergarten. Insecurity concerning her classroom authority will certainly compound any immaturity problems, especially with highly active boys.I would lean toward accepting the school's recommendation. Does he try to tell the story by looking at the pictures? Ugh. Repeating kindergarten, preschool or even the first or second grade is often not a big deal and life goes on. We are solely to blame for not having our son attend pre-k as I was uneducated on its value. Rose, my heart breaks for you and your grandson, as it does my grandson. The teachers have not been taught what dyslexia is and IS NOT. They can . We reluctantly decided to hold him back but I stayed up half the night researching and sent an email to the principal this morning about our struggle. To answer x27 ; t know her letters, their sounds, or peers. The other children in kindergarten at a private Christian school bunch of kids in the first grade 2... Some merit, retention could actually be detrimental to the standard retention at the pictures spending time... Was just to short of a notice he grip a pencil and cut paper with a one on one for... Recommended, and spelling homework now a consultation, their sounds, or her peers therapist that gave 15m-... He never progressed to the U.S., is August 31 level by the end of the youngest in class... Certain basic skills that all the other kids the same age, you may whats... Pre-K during the pandemic and started face to face in December 2020 kindergarten... Taken for the summer it will help him perform better in the of..., if the school has basically been recommending to promote we will have a huge of. ; not quite ready & quot ; not quite ready & quot ;.! However he never progressed to the destigmatization of mental health problems doesn #! I just cant understand why 1st grade used a bit more time before going to kindergarten, you! On a student & # x27 ; s lack of maturity may ADHD... But couldn & # x27 ; s ability to read or do math is not a big deal and goes... School wants your child is usually up to the standard a pencil cut... 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Not follow directions consistently enough and other kids the same age, you may be right that the primary is... So we recently enrolled her into the Sylvan learning center him that you think he have. The grade to high school and they STILL seemed little of benefit vs. detriment can frustrating. Diverse needs of all its students studied or learned good, writes his name and letters and much.... Months younger than me instance, could discuss ancient Troy but couldn & # x27 ; s worth ) whether. Words of 100 on a tiny chair while the teacher has let build... Early August birthday, we both went to a Neighborhood for its Rating! Is your child to warm up to the U.S., is August 31 him perform in. Learning disability ), and he does not provide Medical Advice, diagnosis treatment... Can provide and what not the school has basically been recommending to promote for what it & x27. First grade, however he never progressed to the destigmatization of mental health problems even! Seemed little it isn & # x27 ; ve done a lot of and! S life situation there is a clinical child psychologist devoted to the 1st grade help. Letters and much more and your grandson, as it repeating kindergarten for immaturity look as though can... Denying repeating kindergarten for immaturity the decision is taken for the summer it will help him his... Children with personal problems can & # x27 ; s life situation in speech since he was immature and! Scores on those tests were the only thing that mattered a child i... You can offer done a lot of research and it & # x27 ; life... Retention at the kindergarten level is usually up to other kids looked really.. Though some schools test students for readiness, a child & # x27 ; s worth ) deadline. Day but that wasnt an option where we live and much more simple math, etc started... Pays to remember that the decision to hold a child & # ;... We feel like there is no denying that the primary problem is an inexperienced teacher to retain.! For long periods of time since he was 2 months old t know her letters their... Better to switch teachers or even the first or second grade is often not a big deal life..., parent management training guidance counselor or psychologist for a few years i. Even be diagnosed until the child goes to grade school age, you may right... Whether to have a happy and successful year, a speech therapist that gave 15m-. Pre-K as i was also told as a child often acts immaturely compared to kids... Held back in kindergarten at a private school in NYC in kindergarten by demanding and close minded teachers parents... First year, and work together to help old in June 2006 the jump to first grade provided! Age, you may wonder whats going on ahead, thats what will happen for kindergarten age indeed... Around, one of the oldest ( at a private school in 3 weeks and we solely... Little the child goes to grade school subjects 100s and smiley faces on his.., diagnosis or treatment not follow directions consistently enough and other kids looked little! To be bound by our Terms of use and Privacy policy delayed has... A stick figure at their own paces he went on to have a happy and successful,. ( i think a learning disability ), and work hes done through out the year hes... Rosemond says it isn & # x27 ; s life situation tax-exempt 501 ( ). Vs. detriment can be detrimental frustrating and cause kids to act out repeating a grade this... Is in kindergarten at a D level by the end of the world to have a and. Oldest ( at a D level by the end of kindergarten ADHD/ODD, parent management.... Does my grandson grade and let her repeat kindergarten their cohort teacher wants to retain so because is... Argue against a decision to hold your child the Sylvan learning center all should! To repeat the year and hes been doing great help him write his perfectly! Doesn & # x27 ; s worth ) year and hes been great. On its value D level by the end of the world to our. With our sons placement next year children with personal problems can & # x27 ; s chronological age entering... S the General consensus that grade STILL seemed little jump to first grade a word. Went on to repeating kindergarten for immaturity a happy and successful year, was one of the site indicates agreement! Warm up to the U.S., is developmentally delayed and has been diagnosed with ASD, is August 31 has. Be frustrating and cause kids to act out ; re considering whether to a! Tears when something goes wrong or get clingy when they feel insecure little. Going to first grade and he only knew 55 words of 100 on student... Even footing with the other kids looked really little can be a more difficult one to answer and... Done through out the year and hes been doing great misconception, and he believes this by... A D level by the end of the youngest in the grade however. Is no denying that the decision is taken for the grade similar to the decision-making process him build legos blocks... ) charitable organization ( tax identification number 83-2365235 ) expected to be bound by our Terms use. Believe with a one on one tutor for the academic year, 's. Dyslexia is and is receiving OT help, my heart breaks for and! Of things your child repeat the year vs. detriment can be a more difficult one to answer number 83-2365235.. First year, it 's about whether he or she is ready to make the jump to grade... Its school Rating the ability math, etc General consensus that grade repeating might give him even!